November is National Family Caregivers Month, it’s a time to recognize the valuable, irreplaceable service
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- Caring for loved one with cancer
that Caregivers provide to Cancer Patients. When the Patient is first diagnosed, the Caregiver’s job has started already. Many times, the Patient must be driven to the Dr.’s office for the very first visit. Then after the first visit comes the return visits for procedures. If a tumor must be removed to be biopsied, the Patient will not be able to drive home, or stop at the Pharmacy for the medicines that are sure to be sent home. If the procedure was a small one, great, the patient can maybe go on about life just like before. But what if that procedure was a serious surgery, keeping the patient in the hospital for a week or more, with a long and painful recovery at home?
Even while in the hospital, most patients get good care, but there’s nothing like having your caregiver there with you 24 hrs. a day to take care of the smallest of needs. When you’re in a bed, recovering from a serious life threatening disease, just getting a drink when you need it, not when the nurse can get to you, is a blessing. What about if your able to eat, but need something now, a friendly face beside your bed to get you a snack, or even run across the street for your favorite fast food, is really nice.
Once home, if recovery keeps you confined to a bed, the Caregivers job becomes much more important and stressful. While in the Hospital, the Nurses and Dr.’s were there for the immediate care for the Patient, but now it’s all on the Caregiver. This can be a scary time for them, what if something goes wrong, stitches come unstitched, tubes are draining, pain gets unbearable, can’t sleep or maybe the patient needs help going to the bathroom. And if the Patient is an older Patient requiring equipment, like oxygen or breathing treatment equipment, that must be handled. The Caregiver goes from being a family member or friend, to a medical specialist in a snap. All of a sudden they must give the medicines, fix meals, change the bed, go to the store, do the laundry, clean up the house, communicate with the Doctors and Nurses, and basically just be there for any need. And then sometime during the night, while keeping one eye open, try to get some sleep.
Most Caregivers are appreciated and do a good job, but sadly some either are not appreciated and even taken advantage of, or on the flip side, they are not even interested in playing the part of the Caregiver, even when it’s their sweet wife, or mother who is suffering.
This is a quote from a Cancer Patient discussing this problem on a popular online support site. “Has anyone experienced lack of support from their spouse? Mine could care less if I just died on the couch. He doesn’t help me at all. I have to fend for myself when it comes to the basics (food, drink and general health). He never asks me if I need anything and doesn’t even ask how I feel from day-to-day. This, in itself is causing great depression in addition to the side effects from chemo drugs. Any suggestions”?
Myself, I cannot imagine got taking care of every little need they may have, but as you see, there are those that are less than worthy of a “Caregivers Month”.
There are places to get support for Caregivers, don’t get overwhelmed. If you find yourself getting too stressed out, reach out to friends and relatives for help from time to time to give you a break. Websites such as www.whatnext.com can provide a place to talk to someone and discuss your problems, get things off your chest. One Caregiver has made it his personal journey to provide help for Caregivers after his wife passed away. www.robcares.com is a site devoted to caregivers you can also visit his website pinterest board at www.pinterest.com/robcares
If you have a large group of family and friends that are going to coordinate the care, an online Caregiver Calendar is helpful. Here you can organize your schedule, duties to be handled by each member of the Caregroup, and share the Calendar with each other. You can start your own Caregiver Calendar at http://supportplanner.caringbridge.org/
So for the Month of November let everyone you know who is, or ever has been a Caregiver for someone in need that they are appreciated. We patients literally could not get by without them.
Relay For Life Of Henry County 